The second parts were never good: the best kept exes in the drawer

An expert explains why there are relapses in couples when they leave

How many times have you heard the phrase: ” Sequels were never good “? Surely countless times and in all areas of life, because it works for everything. It is one of the most used phrases by humanity: for a movie, for a book or, as on this occasion, to get back with your ex. There are times when couples end up due to a serious problem, others due to toxicity and others simply because they are not compatible, but the best thing is not to return. Although it is true that there are times when you leave it and the love continues there, there is always some reason to end a relationship and it is better, to end a stage (and more so if it has been traumatic).

There are times when it is better to leave the past aside and take into account only the reality and present of a relationship, the state it is in and what we need by our side, at that precise moment. For this reason, we spoke with Patri Psychologist about overcoming infidelities , how to break up with your partner and about the revenge that exists, on the part of both, when there is a separation involved. There are times when our heads take us to places we don’t want to revisit, the best-kept exes in the drawer.

A happy couple during their relationship

A happy couple during their relationship 

Saying goodbye to your partner is not easy, there must be very clear reasons why we need to run away from relationships and rediscover ourselves. In couples there are no good and bad , there are people who go through an emotional ordeal before leaving their partner and that must be taken into account: “No matter how hard you try to see the pros and cons, when you no longer feel, it is very difficult to continue together”, he confesses. When we find ourselves at this moment, several things must be clear and our expert clarifies it for us: ”We cannot take responsibility for the pain, we have the right to a full life, do not call him out of pity, do not continue as a friend out of pity, decide to take the decision, don’t leave anyone on the phone, don’t ask for time and take care of the couple’s close friends”, these tips are the key to breaking up with your partner from the hand of our expert. If you made such a decision, the time has come to think about you.

Saying goodbye to your partner can be a healthy gesture

Saying goodbye to your partner can be a healthy gesture 

But, it depends on the type of break, some are easier than others. For example, overcoming an infidelity is not easy at all: “Forgive an infidelity is a complicated challenge, more because of the mistrust and uncertainty that is generated, than because of the will of the betrayed person,” confesses Patri. But, when you separate or divorce and there is a family involved, things are more complicated. You have to start thinking about third parties so that it does not affect your personal development: ”If you are the left party, try to accept the breakup in an elegant way. Think about how you want your children to remember the relationship their parents had before they separated. Therefore, you have to measure the consequences of your words and actions ”, she confirms.

Ex couple arguing in the park

Former couple arguing in the park 

When we make the decision to leave a partner, it is for a reason. But why do we sometimes relapse? This can be caused because you feel alone: ​​“When people feel alone, they mistake the nostalgia of loneliness for love, they decide to give a chance to what did not work and, normally, it continues to not work. If you make these impulsive decisions, you will confuse your ex and do him a lot of damage. Give yourself some time and live with loneliness ‘, concludes the expert. After the words of the psychologist, we reconfirm the sentence that opened this publication, the second parts were never good, the exes are better, kept in the drawer.

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